Relationships

“Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” is a very old saying one which  in this  modern technological is often ignored  in our relationships. We have almost come to the stage where we find it easier  to interact more  through  our computers than with human relationships. The constant need for instant responses  to our querries  and challenges  means that we are gradually  loosing the know how to effectively  relate  with our significant other.

After a hard  day at work or when you have finished looking after the children the greatest present you are able to  give to the one  you love is to listen, that is right I did write listen! Get time for both of you to enjoy  some  “us’ time, begin  with something  easy  for example  “What was the best thing about your day?” it will allow  your partner the chance  to be open about their day, as opposed to the every day “how was your day?” to which the reply can  be a one word answer – “Good”. In order that you can become  an attentive listener you must  ask open ended  questions that are unable to  be answered with a one word. Takes practice but the rewards  to your relationship are immense. 

If you are going through these problems then after reading this page  take a look at ‘ how to get my ex back‘ for more advice .

You should  be above all a listener, that allows you to show your respect your partner opinions, at the same time as remembering that ninety percent  of communication between you is unspoken , in other words body language, your partner will soon see that you are not really listening to what they are saying. This will add to your problems and destroy  your relationship given time finally  reaching at the stage  when they say  “you never listen to what I have to say……”, or even  worse “you only listen when you want something…………..”

Do not  interrupt them or try to finish their sentences for them, give them time, it is a little known  fact that we can process words at a much faster rate than we can speak them, so just listen, be interested in what they  are talking about, meet thier needs .

It is not important if your relationship is just beginning or  well established~ long standing}  thebest way to keep it on a firm foundation  is to listen to what your partner has to say about the things that are important to them, then say something only when you have finished listening  and understood what they have been speaking to you about. Sounds very deep I know, but if you just guess that you understand  what they mean without listening properly and give an incorrect response then follow it with the worst put down – ‘I thought that’s what you meant……….”, will simply add to your relationship problems. Neglect things now and you may well end up asking how to get my ex back

Listening is such a small thing to offer your partner, but over many  years I have discovered that one of the most prevelant  relationship problems  is often signaled, during  a relationship advice session, when one or other of them says “She/he never listens to a thing I say………………”, which almost always  means  that when  they communicate  they do not give themslves time to listen, you know the “two ears, two eyes & one mouth” thing, means speak half as much as your listen and look .

Young or old we each of us want  to know that the other wants to listen to  what we have to say and show us the respect we crave  by listening, it can about any subject  for example, their opinion on the latest film/game/book/TV show/what happened in their day ……..the list can be endless and it is frequently  trivial stuff but they want  to share it with YOU, all you have to do is to LISTEN.

Keep you love for each other strong by talking daily  and most importantly LISTENING to what the other has to say, Successful communication allows for  a successful relationship – understand? For more advice how to get your ex back

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